Are you looking for real relationship answers? There are several basic elements that need to be present for a relationship to thrive and be healthy, and the practice of each will enable you to heal current discord and create new partnerships that are deeply fulfilling.
While you may be tempted to tell your partner to do all these, start with yourself first! Why? You will find out when you get to the bottom of this page… ;-)
Honest Communication: The words themselves carry little weight as compared to tone and inflection. Hear the intention behind the words. Body language is key too. Know yourself and be clear about what you want to communicate, both verbally and non-verbally.
BOundaries: This includes creating the personal space that you need and respecting the boundaries of others.
Reciprocity: Through the practice of balancing your own needs, you will more easily find balance in your relationships. We all have multiple selves: the self that needs sleep; the self that needs activity; the self that needs alone time; the self that needs companionship; the self that needs play; the body self; the mind self; the spirit self; the list is long! Balance yourself; practice equality within yourself, and the give and take you desire in your relationships will come naturally.
Sensitivity: Develop a higher level of sensory awareness through more careful attention to your senses... In particular, learn how to really listen. Of all the relationship answers, this one is often challenging; here is a great mirroring technique you might find helpful.
Engagement: Be attentive in your interactions and practice Present-Mindedness. If you are dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, the relationship you are feeding is an illusory one. Authentic connection can only happen in the present moment.
Personal Accountability: Each relationship participant must agree to be Personally Responsible for his and/or her own experience. More simply, resist blaming others for your circumstance.
Laughter: A daily dose of Humor and Fun will help you feel light and let things go. Taking ourselves seriously is a draining habit… but it can be changed!
Acceptance: Acceptance without judgment, or unconditional acceptance of your circumstances, provides the perspective you need for knowing you have a choice. From recognizing that other options are always available, trust can develop.
JoY and Love: The great mystery! Love is the undefinable element that expands when the above pieces are consistently present. The love you want to be mirrored to you must come from the love you practice with yourself!
You don’t have to look far to find the relationship answers you seek. The key is to look within and know yourself. If you feel you still need help in understanding how these dynamics are working (or not working) for you in your relationships, consider joining us for one of our immersion events… Learn about HORSEPLAY from the experts! It’s eye-opening and FUN!